hang in there

When I announced my pregnancy I remember someone telling me that the first 3 months after birth are hell and I remember thinking thanks a lot D bag (ever heard of “congratulations”?). In hindsight the warning was spot on (give a couple extra months) but the timing was poor. Keeping this in mind, I was thinking about doing a post about exactly how hellish the first 4-6 months are, but to keep things positive I’m going to share how I kept my sanity while adjusting to the new reality (life with baby).

1. Get outside every day – go for a coffee, go to the park and sit on a bench, go for a walk around the block. Doing these things saved me on some days when I was going stir crazy with a crying baby inside. L’il E was born in February so the first three months were rather chilly, but I would bundle him up and away we would go. The fresh air in our lungs was healthy and it kills a couple of hours, plus who knows who you’ll run into.

2. Do something that makes YOU feel good – for me that was showering, blow drying my hair and putting a little mascara on.  At first I felt ridiculous because a) new moms are expected to look frazzled and unkempt and b) I had nowhere to be but putting myself together made me feel like me again. Plus it was a huge ego boost when I would go for a coffee – all the other mummies would tell me how great I looked for having such a young little babe. Vanity – check!

3. DATE NIGHT – If someone offers to babysit, pump some breast milk and take the night off! For our first date night The Hubs and I went out for dinner and to the Leafs game. Li’l E was 2 months old and we’re fortunate to have my mom close by to babysit. One tip: go easy on the alcohol! I hadn’t drank much at all (obvi) and that night I had a couple glasses of wine and one of those huge double pints at the game. Wanted to die the next day.

4. Sign up for stuff – When Public Health calls and they will, say yes to everything. I met a dozen amazing women through the Public Health mums group, they all live in my neighborhood and we still get together weekly. It’s a great opportunity to talk about your experiences, find out about other community activities or just vent. Tears will be shed but many more laughs will be had. I love my new mummy friends (hearts!).

5. Call the shots and don’t get too busy. It’s easy to get a crazy busy social calendar. Everyone wants to meet junior and you want to keep busy, but don’t overbook yourself because it will wear you out. My rule – one social interaction/activity a day. Sometimes I just keep a couple of days clear so E and I can hang together and have some down-time at home. Those can be the most special days (tear).

So those are my top coping mechanisms. Take them or leave them. Please share yours too. I would love to hear.

Welcome to parenthood! Remember, you can do this!



Alanna Banks

One thought on “hang in there

  1. Great advice Alanna! I agree that it is KEY to make sure you have one thing planned a day. That said, don’t be afraid to just call it in once in a while…pjs all day for you and the babes. As long as he gets lots of cuddles, he’ll be okay.
    One other major tip is to try to resist the urge to compare your baby and what he is or isn’t doing to other babes his age. You go crazy with worry enough thinking of all the things that could go wrong with your kid, don’t add to the drama by freaking out about the fact that he can’t roll and others can (as, ahem, I have been doing). They all are on their own schedules, and you may has well get used to it!
    And hearts to you too! 😉

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